Fadbulous

Author’s Note: I’m slightly tipsy after a bad day at work.

Do you ever just marvel at our media and wonder where it all went wrong? I certainly do. Which is probably why I stopped paying close attention to the news sometime last year. And definitely why I’ve taken a profound disliking to former news outlets I thought were somewhat worth their weight in editorials. Like, say, an outlet that rides their huffy bike all the damn time.

Maybe I’m just drunk and angry after a long, tiring day where it felt like all I was doing was barely keeping my head above water while smiling and smiling and smiling like everything was perfectly fine.

Or perhaps I’m tired of venturing into social media land only to be bombarded with “Which 1980’s news anchor are you?!” or “Which spirit animal best symbolizes your essence?!” — each one of those goddamned annoying online quiz things that I couldn’t care less about. It just makes me want to start a counter offensive, with quizzes like, “Which diuretic are you?!” or “Which manner of death does your life most closely represent?!”

Of course I’m blathering on about this stuff in the wake of our recent attempt at going gluten-free. But as I sit and type this, I’m surrounded by the leavings of three boxes of Girl Scout Cookies; so, yes, that horse is out to pasture.

I guess my hitch is the whole fadness of it all. Why do we do this shit? It’s not like it’s fun to stare daggers into a neighboring diner’s head as your mouth waters at the sight of their triple cheese-stuffed omelet while you poke at your under ripe fruit bowl speckled with bee pollen.

Are we becoming a coven of masochists — bending our bodies and minds and last bits of sanity to bizarre extremes to prove something to ourselves? Or are we just caught in a net of fads, while we search for something we find personally meaningful?

Author’s Second Note: It’s a week later and I still haven’t posted this. Whoops.

Clearly, I just needed news that was, in fact, news (which I’ve yet to find). And a cookie. Which I’ve since had. And you know what? It helps. And you know what else? That doesn’t mean that I’m a complete failure at maintaining some sort of eating regiment, or that I don’t eat healthy.

I’ve blathered on about food and eating disorders and every other damn thing related to food a bazillion times before, so this is nothing new. I guess what going gluten-free for a few weeks has taught me is this: Be healthy (especially if you discover that you have a legitimate reason to cut things out of your diet). But don’t be someone you’re not. I’m never going to go without a lot of the things that I love to eat (and y’all, I’ve been trying — but gluten-free baked goods are, well, a bit sad). Still, though, I’ve gleaned some tips about new, good things to reinsert into my diet, and those things I could really do without.

Like every activity, eating isn’t immune from being manipulated by the latest trend or coolest fad. So you just have to know when it’s time to say goodbye to those old staples and try something new.

Unless it’s the edible equivalent to acid wash skinny jeans. Then run. And run fast.